What we learned from Game Week 29Tuesday, March 6 2018
Hope this weekend put a big smile on your face. No, I don’t mean listening to Jermaine Jenas’ rib-tickling re-imagining of his career – which I’ll come onto shortly – I mean the fistful of dollar winning bets this weekend.
It’s nice when things go for you – but props to Riyad and Nemanja for their timely wonder strikes that helped deliver a tidy 33.48pts profit from the Match Previews and another couple of scheckles (2.6pts) from the Coupon Busters.
|GW 29||Strike-rate||Pts Profit|
|Tap-ins||8 out of 8||3.75|
|Smart Bets||6 out of 10||14.73|
|Long Shots||0 out of 1||-1.0|
|Scorecasts||3 out of 10||16.0|
Hope you were on a few.
This is what we learned this weekend…
Matic doesn’t score tap-ins…
It was a little bit like the bad old days at Palace on Monday night. Matic’s Fergie-time screamer kept United in second spot – until Saturday, anyway – and maintained our 100% strike rate of Tap-ins this weekend. But I’m not convinced by United. Coming from behind to beat a patched-up Palace is not the same as doing it against a good Tottenham team (which used to happen most seasons, as I recall) and a world away from clawing back Bayern Munich in a CL Final. Enjoy Jose-time. It won’t last.
Arsenal are the worst team in the Premier League…
In 2018. Five defeats from eight in the league and eight from 14 in all comps is as bad as it has been in the Wenger era. By a distance. But not even that tells the whole story…
Of those five defeats, away at Spurs and even the Cup Final defeat to Man City you could probably swallow in isolation. But at Bournemouth, Swansea and Brighton…? And, oh yeah, Nottm Forest. Then at home to that Swedish pub team…?! I’m going to need an emoji in minute.
Even the wins pose ugly questions: Palace and Everton had both rolled over inside 22 minutes (4-0 and 3-0 up on each occasion). Ostersunds? Pfft. So out scrapping Chelsea is their only creditable performance this year (and Conte’s lot haven’t beaten anyone outside the Bottom Four since).
Ready for the punchline?
You’ll get 7/1 to win the Europa League. I’ve had a silly few notes on it.
Jermaine Genius and his missing medals and caps…
Poor JJ. I had no idea he’d had all his medals and caps stolen by that pesky Golden Generation of better midfield players. Lording it with their better managers… more talented team mates… bigger clubs… and superior motivation.
It’s no wonder he didn’t get the… ahem… 120 England caps that he could have (copyright Jake Humphrey, 2018).
Now, Jackanory Jenas isn't unique in his rose-tinted view. We've all got a mate (or ten) in the pub who coulda woulda shoulda done it all if it hadn't been for fast women and Blue WKD.
But let’s just break down this wealth of ‘greatest ever’ English midfield talent that held poor Jermain back…
Stevie and Lamps, fine. Hargreaves and Carrick, yep okay they were decent. But now I'm struggling a bit. Gareth Barry…? Erm...Scott Parker…? James Milner…? Tom fucking Huddlestone…?
If you think you dreamt it, check it out again here…
Also, I've today learned that Jermain has changed the spelling of his surname from Genas to Jenas to call himself ‘JJ’.
Think that should be a ‘P’, JG…
Our Relegation Treble is looking up...
Another West Brom defeat and the Southampton v Stoke stalemate didn’t do our treble on the three of them to go down any harm at all. Unless you are not on yet. I flagged it at 16/1 last week, it’s now trading at 8/1 (Bet365 and SkyBet).
West Brom are already in the taxi with the meter running. But I can’t see Southampton scraping together enough points from their six – yes, SIX - away matches. So they will probably have to beat Chelsea and Man City at home.
‘Room for one more, mate…?’
Stoke only have three winnable looking matches left (Everton and Palace at home, Swansea away). And another couple of drawables (West Ham away, Burnley at home). That’ll add up to 38, which might do. But the Palace and Swansea matches are the last two to play. And could be six… nine… fuck it, 12-pointers by then.
‘Can we have three in the back, mate…?'
See you next Thursday for more of the same. Yeah?
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Johnny is a respected physiotherapist and sports scientist, specialising in football injuries and rehab. Johnny has headed up the medical departments at Chesterfield, Scunthorpe and Notts County. Overseeing everything from player-specific training loads to pre-signing medicals. He has a proven record working with elite athletes in Private Practice and is regularly called upon throughout Europe to deliver presentations on the latest rehab innovations.
Matt's short, unremarkable football career was ended by his own bad driving. His long, distinguished career as a football tipster was ended by his own good advice. Because bookmakers don’t like a winner. First, they closed his accounts. Then his members’ accounts. Then his tipping service. And now they employ him as a consultant. Funny old game.